Gemini

     I love being a Gemini. The fact that I have what most consider to be eternal youth, the ability to see both sides of any argument and make an informed decision. Being so knowledgeable about anything I want to learn and the fact that everyone I know comes to me for the answers, even if I don't know, and I can still help them figure it out. Good, almost the best, at everything I do. There is a certain cockiness I have inherited after opening all these gifts from the stars or god himself, depending on your beliefs.

     Some people say we are two-faced. If you consider the fact that I have no problem helping you out or hurting you in the same breath, I guess that could be considered true. Some think I am a know it all. True. I always think I am right, and that's because about 95% of the time I am. The ones who don't listen to me are the ones who always come back and say they should have, but I am not one to gloat or say I told you so either. Unfortunately this leaves room to make some serious errors in life, but as long as you learn from them and don't repeat your mistakes, you should be ok. Maybe since I try not to make others feel lesser, it is taken as I am better. Anyway I stopped trying to dummy myself down to "fit in"a long time ago.  In the love department the main complaints I get are about being detached and not being loving enough. True, when I'm not really interested no matter how interested I "ACT". Sorry. I get bored easily. Once something has lost my interest, done deal. But are we not all entitled to that? Sex. The one or two women who had any complaints were the main ones jocking- must have not been that bad. That has also caused some women too hang on too long for the wrong reasons also. Let it go. Then again I don't think I've had any non frivolous complaints in the bed department. Any woman I've been with would be more than happy to take that ride again. ( Too Cocky?)

     Now, I have had many acquaintances good and bad but it seems that some signs get on my nerves more than others. Now I'm not saying all of any sign is bad, but for some of these signs it seems like they belong to a person who irritates me at a certain point in time. 1st-Virgo. Yeah I said it. Fucking Virgos with their drama and needing attention all the fucking time. My sister is a Virgo and we don't get along for shit. Its crazy because one of my friends who I grew up with was a Virgo also. I don't like him too much either come to think about it. On the upside, some of the coolest people I have met have been Virgos. Comedians who keep me entertained as hell, like my BM's brother and this white kid I used to work with. Hilarious.

     Next are the muthaphuccin Aries oh my god! Take note, I have been primarily surrounded by Aries since birth. My uncle, brother, sister, friends, studio owner, son and daughter. Why? Because they are so hard headed. Don't get me wrong, some are very loyal (just not towards me) care-taking, good hustlers. But the fact that they operate by doing before they think irks me. All fire signs do that and get mad about the mistakes they make. A leap of faith is good sometimes, but not most of the time. My mom is a Sagittarius-my opposite sign, and though we have some things in common, we argue on everything for that very reason. But I will say this, when it comes to a head up fight, I don't think I want another sign to have my back more than an Aries. As long as they don't stab me in it.

     Guess who's next? You're right-Aquarius! The bulk of my girlfriends have all been Aquariuses. I don't know why. Its crazy because my longest relationship to date was with a Scorpio, with whom my sign has nothing in common besides sex. Actually I think I just answered my own question. I love sex. Anyway: selfish, whiny, liars, and more know it alls than Geminis are. Great at having intellectual conversations about smart nerdy shit ( I like nerdy women too) but bad at human relations. Aquariuses are the smartest sign, so that could be why these women always outsmarted me into getting into it with them. I like the fact that they'll try ANYTHING once, maybe twice if they like it. But as I said before, I get bored-easlily.

     My favorite signs are: Scorpios , because they're serious most of the time like me, Tauruses-because they are fun, Libras- because we get along the best it seems, and Pisces-because they are easy to control. I left other Geminis off the list because honestly, they get on my fucking nerves probably as much as I get on some peoples nerves ( I don't give a fuck) and there have only really been a couple that I kicked it with more than once or twice.

     Anyway I hope you found this shit as funny as I did while writing it. If not....Fuck you too